Blogging U: Who Am I & Why Am I Here?

Sooo I decided to embark on Blogging 101. To create an introduction. I have been signing up for the last year and never did it. I wanted to challenge myself, one, & two, hold myself accountable. To write more consistently. To stick with it.

Who am I? The short version: I’m Tiffany. Originally from small town Georgia, like literally cows & deer & the everybody is your cousin. For as long as I can remember, I’ve danced to the beat of my own drum, coming out to play when I felt like it. An extroverted introvert. Hence, my move to Atlanta & also New York for a bit. I decided to burst out of the closet a few years ago (it was hot in there…) & it has been weirdness ever since. I started this blog to write about my feelings, where my mind goes…over sadness, over randomness, over whatever.

Words are always floating around in my head. I write down whatever comes to mind. Sometimes that can be words or random sketches with commentary. Sometimes I feel like one day I’m going to forget everything I’m supposed to remember; at least these really pivotal moments in my life and I want to remember them. Putting it on paper makes it concrete.

As a child, I was told I shouldn’t talk so much, keep things to myself, don’t share personal things. Into adulthood, I have absently continued to do this very thing. To my mental detriment and I got to a point where I was over it. I don’t mind being bare. And why not in front of a bunch of strangers! Strangers don’t judge you, not at first anyway. They’re just curious. About you. Your story. Writing is exposure, vulnerability, openness, and freedom. I’ve lost my voice & keep finding it again.

Reading this blog, you will hear about my humdrum/drama-filled life: rainbow-flagged, joyful, crazy, spiritual journey, love and love lost, my thoughts on what is going on in the world, and my thoughts on WTH is going on in this world,  & specifically, my world.

My hope is to connect with readers, writers, & wordsmiths who share my love of expression, who enjoy a good laugh, or a good purge. To continue to grow my writing. My hope is that my writing touches hearts, opens minds, heals souls, evokes smiles, and reminds that love is present even if destroying everything in its sight or creating the most beautiful oasis in this life.

Writing is therapy. Writing is fun. Writing is my no filter expression. Writing is who I am. Writing is why I’m here.

 

 

 

 

 

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Video Diary #2 Used To Be Mine

“She’s imperfect but she tries

She is good but she lies…

She is all of this mixed up and baked in a beautiful pie

She is gone but she used to be mine.”

I remember watching the movie, The Waitress, years ago, which has now been adapted into a play and the soundtrack written by Sara Bareilles. One of my favorite singer/songwriters. The story is about a waitress with a beautiful heart whom everyone loves except the person she loves, her controlling husband. Her love for him overshadows the love for herself. She is better to others than she is to herself. Like those of us who want to see the good in everyone, we hope that the good in us will somehow make the ones we love value us more. She struggles to find her voice as it has been silenced for so long. Through her gift of baking, she realizes her passion, her dreams, and begins to imagine the life she always knew she wanted but never thought she could have.

Sometimes little parts of us die when we go through things but if we can push through hard enough & long enough, we spark the flame that ignites the fire in us. We may be broken for a while. We may lose ourselves for a while. Hopefully, for just a little while.

Seeing the parallels to my own life, I was immediately drawn to this song. Inducing those raindrops that fall only from the eyes. At first listen, it sounded like a love song of love lost and it is. Listening more, I discovered it was a song of losing oneself. The person she used to be. I misplaced the girl I was a long time ago and I miss her almost daily. I see glimpses of her sometimes and get excited. It gives me hope that one day soon she will return even better than before.

Take A Long Walk.

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Runner:
Person who runs, enjoys the art  of running & the freedom of hitting Earth’s landscape step by step, even if it isn’t everyday. *Insert photo of self.* 🙂

One of the great things about being a runner is what you learn about miles & distance. To someone who doesn’t walk or run, a mile may seem ridiculously long. A runner knows that ain’t nothing!

  I’d walk 3 miles before I’d consider driving it or catching a bus or cab. It’s not a challenge. It’s not drudgery. It’s not that far…How you think about it is how it is. Alot like life.

If it seems too far or too hard, do we just not try? Give up? Take the easy way? Or do we take a different route? What seems to be the long way? Both pathways will get you there. One quicker. The latter may take a little longer, but in the end, you pushed yourself a little farther. Discovered new things along the way…about the route you never took. New scenery. New neighborhoods. New people. New ideas you wouldn’t have had time to think about that you now have time to ponder. Maybe even discovered something about yourself. It’s a Jill Scott, proverbial “Take A Long Walk”…That I can do.

Bypassing the train this time. Here goes…

Who’s Shining That Light In My Eye??

Drawn To...

 

I’m attracted to lights…

Glaring, piercing, shining, sometimes dull low-light but light no less…

Blinding? Sometimes.

Guiding lights? Sometimes.

Light forced through the blackest darkness? Mostly.

Sometimes needing these same lights to get out of the way…blocking my vision

because they can also make it hard to see my own way…

And I need to see my own way.

Asking myself: Should I wear shades?

Nah…

I’d rather see clearly.

You Only Live Once…

Cheers!

Sip on life. Only the good stuff though. Who wants a crappy drink!

Cheers to new experiences.

Cheers to opportunity.

Cheers to love in its rawest form.

Cheers to the excitement & calm of it all.

Cheers to beginning again.

Cheers to enlightenment.

Cheers to finding yourself.

Cheers to life…. lived, loved, savored.

Cheers!